Thursday 18 October 2012

Who thought that they'd conquered the drink?


I had been doing so well in staying away from the drink, in not wanting any, not having any problem with it. Yesterday I got out of the hospital after landing there on Tuesday evening because I was pissed, yet again.

All these hopes, all these beliefs and then the truth comes out. I got well and truly pissed as a fart again. Not too good, eh. Perhaps I do have a problem here after all, perhaps I am a raging alcoholic after all.

Now it’s time to really do something about it. I’m not sure exactly what yet but I’ll find out and take action. Can’t let this continue because if I do it will just get worse and worse.

That would be no good, now would it. Dr Unsworth would give up on me!!!

Monday 15 October 2012

Home brew and swallowing the pressure-fed lies

Some time ago I fancied making some cider and perhaps some beer but was concerned what the outcome of  around eighty pints of home brew would be. It was rather surprising, to say the least.

I was worried that having so much drink in the house would be almost fatal as I believed that I am an alcoholic and would get stuck right into it all immediately it was ready. Luckily, it didn't go this way though. I actually behaved sensibly, having a pint here and there but nothing excessive. This made me question my roots as an alcoholic.

Some years ago, the woman that I am separated from convinced me that I was suffering from alcoholism. It was easier for me to accept this and join Alcoholics Anonymous as instructed by her than to dispute it, so off to A.A. I went and gave up for a while. I must admit that it bored me so I only went for a short while then gave up the A.A, going back to the odd drink.

After we split up I stopped drinking for over a year without any problem but then slipped back to the whisky and the cider. Since then I have been off and on the drink without any problem, without drinking too much at any time, only taking a drink when I fancied one, generally being pretty well behaved, without any effort at all.

A bit of thought on my part showed me where the alcoholism came from. It was fed to me by the wife, for what reason I don't know but it was fed to me and to keep the peace I accepted it, even carrying it on beyond my marriage. What a lot of crap. I should have behaved sensibly and stood up for myself instead of swallowing the pressure-fed lies that were inflicted upon me.

I enjoy the ginger beer that I brew up and my girlfriend likes it too. We also like the other things that I brew so it's time to get some more on the go.

Cheers :))